Today marks the 39th anniversary for Roe vs Wade which means FB is full of pro-life/pro-choice controversy. Abortion was the topic that inspired me to start blogging on Shades of Grey nearly a year ago. You can read that heated post here: Shades of Grey-Abortion.
In the span of time since I wrote that post I have thought about abortion on numerous occasions and I become more and more pro-choice as I continue on this journey. I get hung up at times as to when I think abortion is justified. And for that reason alone I don’t think any of us should have the right to dictate under which circumstances abortion is right or wrong. And I still don’t believe those who are fighting against abortion should have the right to sit on their righteous high horses spitting out that adoption is the only answer. Believe me…I LOVE adoption…you can go back and read post after post about my opinions on adoption and seeing as I have adopted two special needs children myself it seems very clear that I think adoption is a viable option but here’s my two cents on the pro-life/adoption is the answer messages I read today:
I think the concept of adoption as a fix all is far too idealistic. The problem is that those who demand (typically the religious) that women carry their unwanted child to term and place them up for adoption have not stepped up as part of the solution. While people may be “lined up” to adopt, the reality is they are typically lined up to adopt healthy, Caucasian infants. Those who are dictating pro- life laws are not out adopting the 500,000+ unwanted children in the US foster care system. Instead they are birthing their own children and neglecting the biblical command to care for orphans. The problem is also exacerbated when they go as far as boycotting companies, including the wonderful Susan Komen, that give to planned parenthood therefore providing less low income women the ability to use birth control now only adding to the number of abortions or unwanted children in foster care!
Lastly I think we tend to look through our narrow American perspective. There are 13 million orphans globally! 13 million!!!! Is it not better for a child in Africa to be aborted before it is born only to starve to death a few weeks later? Or a woman to abort her child who is the result of a military rape before that child is born in to a savage war or is trained to be a violent assassin? Each situation is not black and white, candy and roses.
I have been stewing on this all day today and I have more to add to my opinion. I sat here imagining the woman who unwillingly carries her baby to term. The woman who has been knocked up because she didn’t have access to affordable birth control nor the education. She gets pregnant, the dead-beat dad leaves her high and dry, republicans and the religious have told her abortion is murder and shut down the clinics that afforded her that option so she carries the baby the full 9 months all the while scared to death of how she will provide for it.There are no families that are interested in adopting her child and the idea of putting him in the foster care system where he will likely never experience a loving family devastates her more. She reluctantly gives birth to him. She’s uninsured so she now has an outstanding hospital bill to pay and a child who has needs for food and shelter. So she takes a job that she knows will provide. She starts to strip and prostitute for guaranteed income. It makes her feel disgusting and violated but at least she’s providing for her son and that’s most important. She’s a good mom. But she’s lonely and she’s often confused because the same people who told her she would be a murderer and would be selfish if she aborted her son are now stoning her with judgements and unacceptance. They tell her she’s a sinner. They tell her she is lazy and could find another way to provide for her son. They tell her she’s going to hell. Damn.
What’s a woman to do? What’s this innocent child to do? Why are some of us willing to dictate every area of one’s life? Who gives you the wisdom or the right?
And one last thought I had and this probably won’t make sense to a lot of you but it makes me question.
If God willingly “murdered” his Son and it is called a beautiful sacrifice why do we think God would admonish the women who sacrificially “murder” their child? Not every woman who aborts is doing it out of selfishness. I truly believe the woman who knows her child will be born only to starve to death, or will be mercilessly raped and abused, or will not know love, or knows she will have no means to provide for the child is not selfish. She’s not much different than the very God you claim sees her as a murderer. Not that much different at all.
So instead of trying to control what choices a woman can or cannot make and what laws need to be in place to make you feel that God’s will is being done why don’t you just put in to practice the other part of the Bible that tells you to go out and care for orphans (and widows). That would be much more empathetic, loving, and christian…don’t you think?
27 Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.