Some days are easier than others. Some days I just want to scream at the top of my lungs. Some days I feel like the whole world has gone mad, including the man I married. I’m married to an angry atheist. His posts are one of the main reasons I left the world of facebook. I didn’t (and often don’t) like the way he antagonizes those who believe in monotheistic religions. I have a hard time reading the angry and demeaning tones in many of his posts. I still struggle with what people must think of him and of me. I get angry because he has developed this FB persona which is the complete opposite of who he is in real life. At home I get to see the loving, devoted husband and father he is and always has been. I get to hear all the laughter and funny stories and reap the benefits of his hard work. On FB I see a man I don’t know and I’m saddened that that’s the only view many others have. But this only bothers me. It doesn’t phase him in the slightest. I think that’s because I’m a peaceful person. I don’t like conflict or even what I perceive to be potential conflict. Others seem to thrive on these situations. I just bury my head in the sand and hope it will all go away without a scratch to anyone’s feelings.
So who’s right? The man who is willing to push the envelope and challenge the atrocities of religion that actually DO exist? Or the woman who just wants to live her life out peacefully and pretend the atrocities don’t exist?
When I answer the above questions I find that I actually admire my angry atheist husband. Change doesn’t come from those of us who are too worried about offending people. In fact there is a complete double standard and I’m guilty of playing into it. Christians are allowed to get angry when something goes against their belief systems. They are allowed to make ranting posts against Planned Parenthood, Democrats, Non-Believers, School Systems, Taking Christ out of Christmas, etc. Why is it wrong then for an atheist to also make ranting posts? Is it simply because the masses disagree? Well that’s hardly fair.
Christians are allowed to cross the boundaries of church and state time and time again and when it’s called out by a group like ACLU christians get angry. Really really angry. Why aren’t atheists understood when they are angry that the church/state boundary was crossed in the first place.
Christians post daily about answered prayers, prayers needed, God is so good, God is beautiful, scripture verses galore, church activities but imagine the flipside. What if I posted an evolution song (they do exist), or life is great without God, or freethinking tools for kids, or atheist quotes, or praised a battle won against christianity? Would those posts not get everyone in an uproar and immediately deem me angry?I personally didn’t feel that I truly had the freedom to post my thoughts. At least not without opening myself up to harsh criticisms.
Imagine if you posted something along the line of “God answered prayers by delivering my child from a potentially dangerous situation today. Praise God with me.” and I felt the need to comment, “probably was more luck than God but praise be to luck.” You would rightfully be offended. I don’t make those comments on people’s pages because I think to do so is disrespectful and unnecessary. Flip that though. I post, “We were very lucky today to have survived a car accident.” I guarantee there will be people who feel they need to comment with things such as “Praise God” or “You had angels on your side today” even though they know that’s not what I believe. Is that not a double standard?
The double standard that allows one group to fight and be angry for their rights, to state their opinions openly and yet does not grant those same freedoms to opposing views makes me an angry atheist.
And it’s in those moments that I stand up proud. Proud that my husband is angry and proud that he is able to take a stand against the standard. Trying to make the changes and point out the absurdities so that those of us in the minority have a voice too.
I just wish there was a way to accomplish all that needs to be accomplished without being angry and without belittling others. I wish there was a way to be active in a cause and still be loving and kind.
I wish there was a way to be peaceful in this transition and still make the world a better place for my boys.
I’m just too tired and too uninspired to find that way.
Has anyone else found a way to make a change without being angry?
P.S.I absolutely love my angry atheist. I think he is on his way to becoming a positive activist and is on the path to less antagonizing.